Ruby was the STAR of the day at school today. And that entailed my getting alot of stuff ready (and you all know how great i am at that...) So i ordered pictures to put on her STAR board and i set aside time for her to color it and arrange the pics with me, i thought about the book that we were going to read aloud to the class (a little nervous, i gotta say) and filled out the form about why Ruby was a star to us. I was actually a little concerned about it last night and anticipated it like it was my first day of school. (even though i have been there with her before)
Like every day of her lolly gagging life, Ruby missed the bus. She is the slowest poke when it comes to getting ready. About every 5 minutes she breaks from what she is doing in the morning (ya know, the important stuff like getting dressed and eating breakfast) and goes to find (and snuggle) with her kitty. I tell ya, not a morning goes by fluidly...always a little hectic rush. But, hey, that's who we are. Poky, unorganized snugglers.
I dropped Ruby off at school and hurried to get the little ones (one who is forever in his PJ's) to Walmart in time to get some groceries, deposit a check (thank you, Lord) and get home to get my makeup on before Ruby's 11:10 lunch hour.
Like the Christina way, we managed to get it done quickly and got home with about 12 minutes to spare...
...which meant i had to mess with the chickens for about7 of those minutes....anyhow...
I threw on my makeup and some fancy earrings (Ruby always likes that) and headed with the kids to school to spend time with Ruby at lunch, then recess, and then her STAR book reading and commentary from yours truly.
I got to lunch a few minutes late with two little kids in tow and found Ruby. My shining star, Ruby. She was sitting at the table like a perfect angel surrounded by her friends and smiling and waving towards us. My heart skipped a beat. My baby girl had grown up. Right there before my eyes, she was a school girl now. But even with the group of kids vying for her attention she got up and hugged us and showered all her beautiful and caring attention to her mom and siblings. She is amazing. That child is so kind that it blows me away . (Unless its in the middle of the night and her sister is trying to cuddle her...but thats rare.)
I ate lunch with the kids. I love those kids. They are each precious in their own special way. Of course i talked to Ruby's (and apparently Laney's) best friend, Samantha. I have come to love that little angel like my own child.
My Mom surprised us by showing up too. She had come from a hair appointment and Ruby was over the moon. She didn't know Grandma would be here. It was fantastic.
After lunch we went to recess where i watched Laney pretend she didn't know any of us and she clung to Samantha . That's going to be the one i have to reign in, I think. Oy.
As i stood there talking to my Mom in the sunshine and watching my three amazingly perfect kids play, something happened. My heart was soaring and breaking all at the same time. This is a big deal, this school. And Ruby is perfect at it. She is so content on her own, but people seem to love her. Its the perfect balance of wonderful. I watched her go from the monkey bars to the swing, stopping to help her brother get his shoes on the right feet. She came over and gave me and Grandma a hug randomly to assure us of her love. And i felt so overwhelmed with pride in my child that i didn't know what to do. She is growing up. She's becoming this beautiful caring and loving and giving and generous little lady. All the fear and anxiety that i had watching Ruby in kindergarten melted away as i saw her fit so well into the groove of school. School. She is on her way to 12th grade and i want to stop her and freeze time just for a moment. I want to hold her and never let go. I am so proud of her. It wasn't nervousness anymore, she was having fun with her firends. I couldn't ask for anything more. My heart is full today.
As we got back into the classroom i read "Breaking out of the Bungle Bird," one of our favorite books. Ruby sat on my lap and it was indescribable. I got to read my little 5 lined page about why Ruby is a star to us and i ended it by telling the class that "my favorite thing about Ruby is that when she was born i became a Momma." And honestly even though it was just me and 20 little souls, i had to hold it together. I could feel the lump rising in my throat and i had to swallow hard to finish. I felt so full of love when i talked about her and I meant every word that i said about her. Sometimes saying all the things that you think about your baby aloud is harder than we imagine but such a powerful reminder of our intense love for them.
I love my Ruby girl, and i am so proud and honored to be her mother. She truly gave me the greatest gift that i could ever receive.
I am Christina Boone, Ruby's Mom.
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