My joy

Do you ever have one of those days, where the only thing you can do right--is fail?? 

Man, did I have that day yesterday, and it carried into last night, and i woke up thinking about it this morning. 

You know, when you put your heart and soul into parenting your kids and trying to figure out what they need and when they need it, and making sure they are full of love and security in life...its a tough job.  We may not hear we're doing it right. Heck, we may not even be doing it right. But we are trying. With every fiber of our being--we are trying.

And for me, it doesn't take much to get discouraged. Even the slightest bit of inclination that one of my children is suffering breaks my heart and makes me consider every and all things that i have invested in.

My investment is my kids. Period.  That is my job at this house. (well, hubby and kids)  So when i hear they are struggling or behind or not where they should be...i re-evaluate my life. Everything they do  is a direct reflection on me.

Now i don't mean that in the worlds eyes. Like i want to look good. Or appear like i am doing it right. What i mean is if they can't figure something out that i haven't taught them well enough. And it hurts me, so deeply, when i feel like i have let them down in some way. 

Now i know i am a little overboard in my thinking. I know its extreme. We can't do everything right and we can't protect them forever. But i want to. For them. 

So this morning i woke up feeling a little blue.  Nothing much, just not the normal chipper chicken that i am.

But as i was walking and praying early this morning --an image of Laney putting her arm around her friend at the field trip on Wednesday came to my mind.

And it made me smile.

And then i thought about how Junior is literally the worlds best kisser. Bar none.

Or how Ruby sneaks out of her room on Wednesday nights (when Jeromy is at church) and smiles as she joins me on the couch for a little special "Mom and Ruby time."

And then i remembered last night as we played on the swing set how Junior slid down the slide with pure joy (holding a stick, or course) as he pretended someone was after him.

And then i thought of Ruby with her sly smile and her knowing eyes.

Which made me think of Laney's amazing ability to make her brother laugh whenever he is sad.

And how Ruby is growing up right before my eyes and at the dinner table, she says things like "JK, Mom...JK!

Then i thought of how much i loved to snuggle in between my girls at night and read them their new American Girl book series.

And how my heart feels full at night when i lay next to Junior and i say "I love you." And he leans over and kisses me and says, "I love you too, Mom."

There is so many things to feel happy about. So many blessings. So much life. I don't want to waste my time focusing on the what if''s of every possible scenario.

I want to enjoy my kids.  Because they are so utterly amazing. And when i am looking at them, nothing else seems to matter any more...

I hope today all of you can find joy in your families and forget your troubles. If only for a moment.

                                                      Because that's what i'm going to do....

Ruby's Party!

Alright, today was such a fun day and i realized after i thought about posting about 12 pictures on facebook that i might as well do it on here instead and relive the day!

Today was Ruby's 7th birthday!  (I can't believe she is seven.)  And for the first time ever, i decided she could have a "friend" party. Family always seems to be busy and i thought what better time than now to start this new tradition? 

We invited all the girls in her class.  I did NOT want to only invite only the close friends because it could very well (and probably most definitely) get out and someones feelings would be hurt. I did not want that happening.  I thought there was only 8 ish girls in her class...but after writing out invites, realized there was actually 13. Oh, boy...

I made the food Ruby requested and waited for the first guests to arrive.  It was glorious.  We took a few pictures as we waited...

After reviewing the photos, i noticed i looked like a little hoggish and decided to change shirts and brush my hair again...

The girls came one by one and Ruby was so pleased.  Each new arrival signaled a group of screaming girls who came up or ran down the stairs to meet their friend.  It was amazingly fun. 

Before we ate lunch i asked the girls to sit on the couch so i could take a picture...

                  They didn't exactly listen so i asked again...(should have taken that as a warning)

  Then we waited for the hot dogs to finish up on the grill and they all decided (not me) that they were going out side...and out they went.

                      Was safety a concern with 12 people on the trampoline?  Yes, yes it was.

   After lunch we went back outside to get ready to hit the pinata!  My favorite part...

 As we were hitting the pinata and having fun thats when the second little bout of girl problems happened.  One little girl went to swing on the swing as the rest of the girls took their turn.  I realized this and stopped the activity to yell to her to come over and after a bit of talking she informed me that she was mad because so and so was being mean to her...which lead to so and so defending her actions and a few other girls adding their two cents...Fhewwww....this girl stuff, i tell ya....they're going to have a long school career if they are already being mean to each other...Oy.

  At one point, i caught Ruby inside just sitting on the couch. Alone. In the quiet. Just as content as can be...

She covered her head when she realized i was taking a picture.  This is when i started to realize that my girl doesn't need all the flair other kids need. She likes quietness, routine and family...at her house.  (Note to self for next year.)

                                    Inside the festivities were under way--PRESENTS!

 

Ruby opened this monster doll thing and looked at me nervously at first and i shook my head and then she made this cute little sneaky smile...It may have been cute at first, but she is not keeping that thing.

Then we had cake (and i broke up a few more girl fights down stairs).  All in all it was a really fun day and i think Ruby liked it, but i also know that she really liked it when everyone was gone and her and Laney could play Barbies together again-- minus the girl drama that exists among 7year olds!

After everyone left, we changed into our "comfy" clothes and Ruby said she did want to go and get her ears pierced!!(which earlier that day had changed as all the girls chimed in on how much it hurt and how much they cried when they got their ears pierced. Thanks girls!) Our birthday promise to her.  Jeromy and i were excited and we loaded the car and headed to Northtown (even though all i wanted to do was put on sweats and watch t.v)

Ruby was very brave when we got there. Never wavering in her decision. I was proud and shocked, but i guess not surprised. She's my tough bug.

Not a tear was shed and she barely even winced...unless you were her mother, you probably didn't even see it!

It's been a great day.  A memorable day.  I love that little face.

                                                     Happy 7th Birthday my love!!

Now...where is that warm bath and book...i've got some relaxing to do!! :)

*Home*

You know what? I'm just gonna say it...I know its taboo, but i don't care. If you're offended by this post, then you are probably the exact person i am talking to...

When your kids are sick. Stay home.  Care for them. Stop your busy, self indulgent life, and show them that they rank way above any other commitment that you have. Slow down. Just SLOW DOWN, would ya?...

I believe kids get sick when they are run down.  Well germs take kids down, but when they are run ragged and have no time to recuperate and find peace in the comfort and slow moving routine of HOME, then they get sick quicker and more often.  I am not just shooting from the hip here. It is proven.  I think most parents know this.

Actually, i wonder how many parents do know this? 

I have run into mother after mother who has a sick child, but doesn't slow down her (or her childs) day one bit.  Seriously?!? Have Mothers gotten that selfish now that we don't even consider our children's health?? If they don't need an antibiotic (don't get me started on the overuse of those!) then they can "technically" keep going to school, friends houses, church, sports...anything!  Just because you think a child is not "contagious" doesn't mean they should leave the house.  Kids are sick because there is no structure at home. No time to just "be", no time to even think about being bored.  Bored is a good thing. A really good thing. It means kids have enough time to sit and use their imagination. Out of boredom comes genius! With out time to just be and sit and think and enjoy life kids get run down. We take away their childhoods when we try to make them match out busy schedules.

And when a child is run down (sick), its not that i, as a friend or other adult, am incapable of dealing with them or caring for them. Its that i am not their mother and i would NEVER ship my sick kid off. Ever. Never ever! So i am insulted when others try to do it to me. Sick kids need to be at home in their little bed with their Mom by their side. Every step of the way. I don't care if your 17 or 2, i absolutely stand by this and will continue to respect other parents when my child is sick and i will not run them ragged just to keep up with my daily schedule.  Respect us other parents out here who don't want to run our healthy kids into the arms of a cougher, a puker, a fever, or a sicky.  Not only that, but don't--and i repeat--DON'T act offended when a person turns down a playdate because your child is sick. The fault is your own...not ours-who want to protect our home.

I think Moms, even more that Dads, need to be home with their children when they are ill.  You couldn't get me out of the house if one of mine babies were sick. I don't care if Jeromy is here and he wants me to go...its not happening. My kids need their Momma, and i would never tell them no (when it comes to spending time with me). I know so many women who have such a tight and busy and very self gratifying schedule that they literally have NO time to slow down if a child is sick. No time. Its just doesn't fit into the schedule and believe me, that child is going to feel it. They will eventually realize where they rank, when they are laying ill on the couch--alone--trying to figure out how to get a sip of water. Or throwing up in the middle of the night--alone--wondering if they can dump their own puke bucket.  It breaks my heart.

Our poor children are not made to keep up with our intense schedule. Rush here, rush there, sleep over night there and this or that person will pick you up when you need them to.  

Kids need their Moms. Period.  Especially when they are sick.  I am passionate about this and i know it will bug some of you busy-bees(that's my nice way of saying it), but that's life, i guess. I get annoyed when you bring your sick kid in public so you can get annoyed at my passions on this subject. 

The reason i am ranting about this is because i am so frustrated with it!! What will happen to our next generation when they don't even have a firm foundation of home?  Why is there nothing different about it? Nothing comforting, nothing reassuring, nothing slow, nothing warm, nothin embracing or refreshing?

And why aren't more people concerned about it?

Home has just become the next stop before a recital, program, conference, group, class, or work. 

And that makes me really sad...